Boyfriend is blaming me
I just don't know what to do! I have a long history of sexual abuse.. It happened for years through childhood, I was raped freshman year of college and then raped again about a month ago. I was drunk and at a bar with my boyfriend and some of his friends. My boyfriend and I got in a fight and left me at the bar, so his friends brought me home with them. One of the guys offered his bed to me, saying he would stay on the couch. In my drunken state, I thought it sounded good. I woke up to this guy raping me...violently. The next day, I told my boyfriend and he initially said he believed me. now, a month later, we are having a lot of issues around this. he says he is having a hard time trusting me and believing that I wasn't asking for it. Since the attack, I have had a very difficult time being intimate with him and he is also very angry about this saying that I was able to be intimate with someone else, why can't i be intimate with him. This just angers me! Should i break up with him? how can I convey it's not my fault? I don't know what to do
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