Everyday Victim Blaming

challenging institutional disbelief around domestic & sexual violence and abuse

WHY

I'm 32 a mother. Went through the blame game through child hood. Left the country to escape from the misery and blame and it still has not stopped. I thought I would understand after having a baby but now i realise that it is not the same or normal and what I experienced is something that i don't want my child to experience. I was criticised in public, she called my friends and told bad things about me, told bad stuff to my ex boy friends parents, always humiliate me for everything, nothing i do is right for her,brags about my sister, i was like a prisoner at home until i left.

To get me to do things her way she use her sickness ( high blood pressure) to get the way she wants. Now she is blaming me for her illness and death(which she thinks that is my fault.)

I went to a doctor I thought that there is something really wrong with me.I dont have much friends and I pick the ones I like to be with and she thinks that I don't have any friends and I have a mental illness.

 

We do NOT give permission for posts published as personal experiences to be reproduced, translated or otherwise published elsewhere. We will not contact people who submit their personal experiences on behalf of journalists, bloggers or other third sector organisations. These testimonies remain the intellectual copyright of their authors and must be treated with the ethical guidelines used by academics for research involving human subjects. Our full guidelines can be read here.

Download this post as PDF? Click here Download PDF

, ,

Comments are currently closed.

One thought on “WHY

  • lynda sherlock says:

    i to like you have a mother who blames everything on to her children
    and has never ever taken accountability or responsibility for her behaviour to any of her children or to my adopted dad. She not was only violent and abusive but humiliated and emotional abused her children. Often society always blames men of abuse whether it’s physical sexual emotional or even financial. But society must look that women can abuse as much as men. Society see women as the care givers a mothers love for her children that women definitely cannot abuse their child. When you have a mother who makes out your lying because of child hood abuse or humiliates you in front of your neighbours or members of your church. Or gets your siblings to mock and bully and isolated you or physically abuses for years you go back because your mother had a hard life was abused most of it and you just wanted to rescue and show her love with out abuse. But then you realise when you have a child that you don’t want to treat your child the way your child is treated i can’t tell anyone what to do but for me i decided to get of the merry go round and decided for myself that my contact with my mum was over for my emotional health and not to be abused by her anymore i see it’s her problem the way she behaved towards me and my siblings not my fault. i feel free that i have no contact with her now and it’s lovely and though it’s lonely at times not to see my family i feel it’s ok for me