Everyday Victim Blaming

challenging institutional disbelief around domestic & sexual violence and abuse

Suffering Still (content note)

When I was 9, I was sexually abused. He gave me genital herpes. This wasn't diagnosed for 20 years (for other medical reasons).

I talk openly about the abuse I have suffered over the years, but I can't tell people about the herpes.

I am infected. Will be for life. He has scarred me. Literally. Everytime I get an outbreak, I am reminded of that time when I was 9. Looking up at the clouds, wondering when the hell he'd get off me.

People will never understand just how much my life and the crap I have been through has nearly killed me. Several times over. I still think about it.

 

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3 thoughts on “Suffering Still (content note)

  • Admin says:

    Thank you A, for sharing your experience with us. We believe you.

    The issue of physical harm (such as the recurring infection) is something that we don’t see discussed very often, so thank you for your courage.

    We need to move away from thinking about sexual abuse as only affecting us emotionally, or psychologically – what we need is a holistic approach that looks at the impact on the whole of us, as survivors.

    If you would like support from an organisation who won’t judge and will believe you, we list some great services on our Get Support page.

    Sending peaceful thoughts x

  • Rusty Cage says:

    That sounds so hard to have to re-live your horrific experience. It must be hard to ever draw a line under what happened. I’m so sorry for you. You must be so strong to keep going.

    Wishing you continued strength for the future.

  • Gill Ward says:

    You have so much strength. I’m blown away by how amazing you are both for going through this (then and now) and sharing your story. Long may your strength and tenacity and bravery continue. You’re an inspiration. Wishing you calm times ahead X