Everyday Victim Blaming

challenging institutional disbelief around domestic & sexual violence and abuse


I am a survivor of domestic abuse. The first time it happened was when I was between 16-22 years old.

I was made to dress provocatively and was told that this would help me to become a model and people would take notice of me if I dressed that way.

He even looked through womens magazines and told me how I need to look and how I don't look like the models at all.

Of course it was all for my own benefit as well as him taking degrading photos,he was so considerate that he never punched me in the face, always the rest of my body.

How kind.

This dress sense led to me being called a prostitute by a member of my own family.

As well as all the other abuse I was suffering with and at such a young age, although at any age it is just as harrowing and degrading, my self esteem was so low i wanted to end it all.

Now aged 40 I am volunteering with women and children who going through abuse and intend to carry on and use my experience to help others.

Things can change. They did for me, although the scars emotionally and mentally will never go away, they are not controlling me any more.


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