Everyday Victim Blaming

challenging institutional disbelief around domestic & sexual violence and abuse

I said no but he didn’t listen.

I was out one night with a few friends, towards the end of the night me and one the guys kissed. He said he wanted to bring me home but I said no, I wanted to go home to my own house. Four of us were getting a taxi, and I said I was going to my own house. When he said no, I was going to his. I argued but he made the taxi go to his and made me get out. I went to his and said I'd stay for awhile because he said he would drop me home in an hour. Time went by and he wouldn't bring me home. He convinced me to lie in his bed where we would just cuddle. Next thing he took off all his clothes and tried to take mine off, I kept saying no but he took them off anyway. Then he kept trying for sex and for me to feel him. Again, I said no. I didn't want it to happen. I wasn't comfortable with it. I didn't want it. But he kept at me and at me, and we had sex. I was in tears during it. I didn't want it to happen. Then I got dressed but when I started dozing off, he unzipped my skirt and starting feeling me again. He wanted more. I said no and kept trying to move away from him. He kept saying that i was being stupid, that to just come and do it. Just for a few minutes, that it was only a bit of fooling around. But I didn't want it. I eventually got him to drive me home. I've never felt so uncomfortable and disgusted with myself. I said no repeatedly but he didn't listen. He was a friend of mine and in college with me, but I can't look or think of him the same anymore.

 

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2 thoughts on “I said no but he didn’t listen.

  • Katie says:

    I am so sorry this happened. You were raped and sexually assaulted. It was not your fault and there was nothing you could have done. It is entirely his fault. He is a rapist and the taxi driver should have not listened to him if he knew what was happening. I hope he stays away from you. I know how hard it is to have to face your rapist again.

  • Jenny says:

    He had no right to do any of that to you. You made it clear you didn’t want to have sex with him and he made you do it anyway showing no regard for you, your feelings or your body. Stay strong, you are a survivor. If you feel you need support contact your local rape crisis centre.