Everyday Victim Blaming

challenging institutional disbelief around domestic & sexual violence and abuse

Changing behaviour to avoid abuse

I had to change my behaviour in lots of way to avoid abuse (physical and mental) but it still happened regardless. I wasn't allowed to disagree or speak out if i wasn't happy with something.

My best way of getting my point across would be to text whilst he was at work then i didn't have to deal with his wrath straight away,always hoping he would have calmed down by the time i saw him,then he would blame me for "starting" while he was at work (he drove a lorry by himself so i wasn't getting him in trouble or anything)

I was just to scared to confront him directly which speaks volumes in its self.So he was blaming me for the abuse because i dared to challenge him even if it was indirectly.

He was my second abusive relationship,was with a narcissist for 6years and i didn't want to go down the same path as i did with him so tried my hardest to be strong but he was more calculating than the narc,have now got a restraining order in place which he's breached once already.

Sorry have gone off a bit on a tangent but i hope ive given you an example of victim blaming. I follow you on twitter,keep up the good work!


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